
The Absurdity of Jesse Watters’ Masculinity Rules
In a disheartening exhibition of fragile masculinity, Fox News host Jesse Watters recently presented his amusingly outdated guidelines for what it means to be a “man.”These suggestions have drawn widespread ridicule for their sheer absurdity.
Watters’ Bizarre Manliness Criteria
As if it weren’t sufficient to declare that men should never wave with both hands, Watters has taken his opinions further. In his view, drinking from straws, savoring milkshakes, openly enjoying soup, or even crossing one’s legs are all actions unbecoming of a man. During a recent episode of The Five, he passionately criticized former presidential candidate Tim Walz for momentarily indulging in a milkshake through a straw—a decision that, according to Watters, is emblematic of “effeminacy.” He argued that the way one’s lips form while sipping through a straw is not suitable for a man. Ironically, he dismissed milkshakes as treats intended solely for children, even though they are merely a delightful concoction of ice cream.
A Life Lacking Joy
This raises the question: can Watters truly live a fulfilling life, free from the burdens of such rigid expectations of masculinity? It seems he has sacrificed the simple joys of life on the altar of manliness.
Tim Walz Responds
In response, Walz discussed the pervasive culture of hyper-masculinity with Gavin Newsom on a podcast, highlighting its societal impact, particularly on MAGA-affiliated men. With a touch of humor, he implied he could easily outmatch his critics, saying he could “kick all their ass*s.”This statement predictably ignited backlash among right-wing conservatives, including Watters. In a misguided attempt at a comeback, Watters reminded viewers of the derogatory nickname “Tampon Tim, ”a jab referring to Walz’s advocacy for making menstrual products readily available in schools.
There’s nothing weird about Jesse Waters secretly enjoying a bowl of soup alone in the dark.pic.twitter.com/qgNUyTaSgj
— Tim Walz (@Tim_Walz) March 20, 2025
The Internet Reacts
Walz was not alone in ridiculing Watters’ intolerance. On Bluesky, user Paul John Lyon quipped, “Today, I’m going to eat delicious soup with my legs comfortably crossed and drink a tasty milkshake with a straw.” This sentiment was echoed by others who challenged Watters’ hypocritical stance, including a post showcasing a moment where Watters himself was seen drinking from a straw during a broadcast.

Redefining Masculinity
As the world evolves, it’s crucial to embrace a more inclusive and positive interpretation of masculinity—not one that confines joy and self-expression within arbitrary boundaries. So, eat your soup, enjoy your milkshakes, sip through straws, and cross your legs if it makes you comfortable. Jesse Watters’ opinions on masculinity are outdated and ultimately irrelevant.
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