8 Marvel Characters Whose Superpowers Are Surprisingly Useless

Marvel Comics boasts an impressive roster of characters, featuring iconic heroes such as Spider-Man, Captain Marvel, and Thor, along with formidable villains like Doctor Doom, Sabretooth, and Galactus. Despite this, not every character shines with immense power; some stand out for their remarkably underwhelming abilities, leaving fans to wonder about their utility in the Marvel universe.

Many characters within the Marvel universe possess powers that range from the underwhelming to outright useless. Notably, a number of these characters originate from the X-Men franchise, where their unique mutations often leave much to be desired. Characters like ForgetMeNot and Bailey Hoskins illustrate how certain powers may actually hinder rather than help. Below, we delve into eight Marvel characters whose abilities may not live up to expectations.

8 ForgetMeNot

Debuted in X-Men: Legacy #300 by Christos Gage, Mike Carey, Simon Spurrier, Rafa Sandoval, Steve Kurth, Tan Eng Huat, Jordi Tarragona, Craig Yeung, Allen Martinez, Ulises Arreola, Rachelle Rosenberg, José Villarrubia, and Cory Petit

ForgetMeNot possesses the rather inconvenient power of being forgettable. This ability allows him to avoid detection by telepaths and technology, a boon that could theoretically serve him well as a spy or in more nefarious activities. Yet, he’s often overlooked by teammates and foes alike, rendering his powers virtually useless in most scenarios. Known as Xabi, ForgetMeNot’s altruistic nature often overshadows his forgettable existence, as he strives to make a difference even if it goes unnoticed.

7 Beak

Debuted in New X-Men #117 by Grant Morrison, Ethan Van Sciver, Prentis Rollins, Hi-Fi, Saida Temofonte, and Richard Starkings

Beak, a mutant with avian traits, is more bird than superhero. Although he boasts hollow bones that should in theory enable flight, he can barely achieve lift-off for short distances. Often described humorously as a “bird with a baseball bat,” his only notable weapon is a titanium bat he wields. Despite his underwhelming abilities, Beak maintains that his real superpower lies in his knack for building friendships. While his bird-like attributes prove less than advantageous, his talons do provide some utility in battle.

6 The Wall

Debuted in Spidey Super Stories #8 by Jean Thomas, Win Mortimer, and Mike Esposito

Joshua Waldemeyer, known as The Wall, literally became a wall after a catastrophic workplace accident. Transitioning from brick mason to a living wall, his powers primarily involve physical obstruction and chaos. During a confrontation with Spider-Man at a Mets game, it became evident that his powers resulted in more comedy than conflict resolution. In a rare twist, Spider-Man was able to reason with The Wall, potentially altering his villainous path.

5 Dirk Anger

Debuted in Nextwave: Agents of H.A.T.E. #1 by Warren Ellis, Stuart Immonen, Wade Von Grawbadger, Dave McCaig, and Chris Eliopoulos

Dirk Anger showcases the curious paradox of being an exceptionally unlikable individual endowed with the power of slow aging, extending his life to over ninety years. However, this relatively mundane ability is overshadowed by a plethora of psychological issues, including a penchant for self-destructive behavior. Originally intended to be a spin on Nick Fury for the Nextwave series, Dirk Anger’s inability to redeem himself or his powers effectively casts him as a character who embodies frustration.

4 Eye-Scream

Debuted in Obnoxio the Clown #1 by Alan Kupperberg

Imagine having the ability to transform into any flavor of ice cream, from classic vanilla to elaborate banana split. This is Eye-Scream’s primary ability, which, while whimsical and certainly appealing to children, lacks practical applications in most battles. Although he did bring joy to a town under siege with free ice cream, his talents seem more suited for a birthday party than a superhero showdown. Remarkably, he shares this ice-cream-centric trait with another character, Soft Serve, who can turn excrement into ice cream. Talk about a unique but unhelpful duo.

3 Bailey Hoskins

Debuted in X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever #1 by Max Bemis, Michael Walsh, Ruth Redmond, and Clayton Cowles

Bailey Hoskins’ power is a cruel twist: the ability to self-detonate, but only once. This unfortunate ability guarantees death upon use, rendering it near worthless as a superhero asset. With no regenerative capabilities akin to Deadpool or Wolverine, Bailey’s plight highlights the absurdity of his existence in the superhero realm. A power that can only end a career before it truly begins is hardly effective.

2 Longneck

Debuted in New X-Men #140 by Grant Morrison, Phil Jimenez, Andy Lanning, Chris Chuckry, and Chris Eliopoulos

William Hanover, better known as Longneck, possesses the astonishingly limited power of a slightly elongated neck. Although his oddity might amuse, it hardly provides any strategic advantage in combat. He even accompanied the X-Men on various missions, yet his power was stripped away during the M-Day event. The loss of such a distinctive ability sparked little lament from the X-Men community—or perhaps from the readers, either.

1 John Zander

Debuted in District X #2 by David Hine, David Yardin, Alejandro D. Sicat, Andy Troy, Rob Steen, and Richard Starkings

Contrary to the powerful blue mutants like Nightcrawler and Beast, John Zander, also known as Jazz, is known solely for his azure hue. With no discernible superpowers beyond his color, he has been labeled as a low-level threat by O.N.E. His lack of any additional skills, coupled with a mediocre talent for rapping, solidifies his status as one of Marvel’s least impressive characters—proof that sometimes, even in a universe filled with extraordinary abilities, some mutants truly miss the mark.

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